BEYOURPET

I’m really excited for the weekend, because we’re taking a trip to visit the places we might move to. North Carolina and Virginia (and Chicago just briefly because we happen to have a lay over there for 3 hours, so we’ll probably go to eat or just look around if at all possible).
Trev wants to go to the campuses to talk to advisers and professors and such, and to just look around, and we’ll also spend a lot of time looking around the main areas of the towns, to get a feel of them. I’m really excited to do this because it will make it all feel really real! But also scared, because if we really like one place and don’t get to move there, it will be sad. But I’m trying to just be optimistic about all the places so that we’re happy no matter what happens…

We fly out Thursday and get back Tuesday, so lots of hotel staying! And a decent amount of flying. Flying is pretty weird to me, sort of annoying and exciting at the same time. The first time I ever flew was just last November when we went to Disney World… So it’s still really new to me.

It actually helps me to pack though. Because you have to pack the “bare minimum” when flying, and my impulse is usually to pack the “bare maximum“, haha… So it actually helps me to live out of a suitcase without so much fuss. Which I hate and like at the same time…

So I will finally do Matsuo‘s tag… Sorry Matsuo for taking a year and a half to do this!

Here are the rules:

(To see more, click the CUT link)
Okay let’s get started!

Eleven Facts About Me:
(Sorry some of these are kind of long…)
1. I am a very boring person in a lot of ways and I love it… For instance, the idea of going to a colonial museum or eating breakfast at a little cafe sounds a million times more exciting to me than going to a party or a concert. I’m not really into the normal “youthful” stuff I guess you could say. I am sometimes, and there’s been periods of my life where I was more into it, but I get a lot more pleasure out of simple happy moments and interesting curious experiences. I also am not a big fan of drinking (I think I am allergic, it *always* makes me feel sick no matter what) or drugs, like pot (they kind of terrify me because of the psychological damage it can cause to those susceptible to neurological probs, like myself).

2. I have about a million different hobbies and interests, and all of them can totally excite and engross me with little effort. This is why I tend to go from project to project, or why I’ll post a ton of art or diary entries and then nothing for a while. I have periods of different hobbies. For instance, some of my latest trends have gone from being obsessed with organizing & planners, to being obsessed with blogs and improving my diary, to being obsessed with developing story characters, then writing a book, and now it’s with moving. I know it’s pretty sensible if you know my life, but I guess the main point about it is that these things *consume* my thoughts for periods of time, and then just stop out of nowhere and something else takes it’s place!

3.I’m really into following someone’s life through blogs and such. I currently subscribe to 205 blogs and about 50 of those I check pretty regularly (the rest I just check in when I have the time or craving to). I guess I am the type of person that likes to live vicariously through someone else. I also do this with YouTube vloggers, I subscribe to probably about as many channels on YouTube as I do blogs… Right now off the top of my head I’ve been obsessed with at least 5 different bloggers that I am reading their back entries over time. It’s a fun past time!

4. I’m really interested in “simple living”, as in growing food and having some chickens and goats and such. I think I get this from my dad’s survivalist mentality and my mom’s interest in crafts, gardening, and home schooling. I really like the idea of living off the land and just making things work without getting a bunch of extra help through technology and products. Not that I do this well now, because it’s actually quite expensive to begin with, but I think it’d be awesome to own some chickens, a goat, some land, and grow some of our food! It would feel very satisfying.

5. I’ve always been really attracted to old houses (I grew up in a house that was, at the time, about 100 years old). I would love to own and live in one one of these days, if I ever have the money for it. They take a lot of work to maintain, but the structure, architecture, and modeling in old houses are pretty much unbeatable… I really miss having hard wood floors. I would LOVE to have an attic that’s actually usable. Having an artist studio or a bedroom in an attic that can be reached by stair case would be a dream.

6. I am sosososo into ghosts and paranormal stuff! I love hearing people’s ghostly or weird experiences, and always hope to have my own… I listen to Coast to Coast whenever I can, and am a big fan of shows like My Ghost Story. If you ever have a good (true) story to tell me, or a show to recommend, please do!

7. I love breakfast food and baked goods to a fault. I plan to have a “tea party” themed birthday party this year in which I am allowed to consume (as well as my guests) ridiculous amounts of tea and crumpets, petit fours and butter cookies. Yummmm!

8. I hate conflict, but I happen to be an opinionated person at the same time… So it’s kind of weird. Sometimes I will speak my mind but then if someone gets riled up over it and act negatively about it, and I usually get really depressed about it and dwell on it for days… So I try really hard to avoid upsetting people, but sometimes I talk too much about what I’m thinking… But I really really dislike conflict…

9. I actually have a suspicion that the internet will die at some point, like, I’m not sure why or what I think will cause it. Probably censorship or laws and that such trouble… But I do have a conspiracy theory that the internet will be taken away from regular people… Maybe replaced with something really unpleasant, something that makes more money for corporations… I don’t know. The internet is too good to be true. It scares me when I think about it so I try not to think about it.

10. I have probably mentioned this before because it’s been a consistent thing in my life since I can remember, but I have very strange dreams, every single night. They’re always weird and usually scary/gory/horrifying. Sometimes they’re just random and strange. They’re always beautiful in their own way… All of my dreams take place in this other world landscape where everything is decayed and dilapidated. I don’t know why. I hope one day I can put these places into my art, but I don’t even really know where to begin, they’re so vast and detailed… It would be like drawing the world you see around you, only harder because it’s a damn dream!

Now, on to the questions asked by Matsuo…

◆ How was your high school year?
High school is pretty much a big empty space in my brain, I barely remember most of high school now, I don’t know why. I spent a lot of time alone, and some of my favorite memories were from time spent online. It’s the time when I got a lot more into online communities, and made some friends surfing diaries (I was on diaryland at that time). And eventually in 2005 I joined Flickr and made lots more friends there and got started with photography, but that was near the end of high school by that point. I hardly remember my early years of high school. I had a few different boyfriends throughout the years of high school, and one I ‘kept for 3 years and we broke up after high school. So most of my memories are from hanging out with any of them or my other friends… I had some amazing fun times with my school friends though, and my BFF Shelly, we had the *best* times.
The end of high school was consumed with the “sickness” of obsessing over a man a lot older than me, that essentially paid me no interest. I got very sick over this whole situation and was very very upset over the lack of outcome ‘cos I don’t know, I thought it would work out in a hot Lolita way I guess.
High school was a dazed haze over this. I feel like high school was wasted on me, I have been about 200 years old my entire life, I’ve never felt like a young person. I didn’t have a very normal reaction to high school… I think all my peers thought I was a total weirdo, and they would have been right probably. I thought most of them were totally boring and clueless anyway, so I didn’t let it get to me that often… Oh well. I actually enjoyed high school quite a bit, it was Jr High that was completely miserable for me.
(Here’s some photos from long ago: 1. Me and my friend from Jr High, this was the semester before high school started. 2. Me and my brother on prom night, bein’ the coolest kids there obviously. 3. My kitty Perk, who now lives with my mom & dad… He’s still my number one lover boy.
The next photos are some of the first photos I posted on Flickr when I first started doing photography… I took all of them in highschool with my point and shoot Kodak camera…)

◆ Which toy was your favorite as a kid?
Definitely the internet/computer sites and games I frequented. I LOVED Sierra games like King’s Quest, and those adventure games like Hugo (which apparently can be downloaded for free here: 1, 2, 3, 4)… So fun, those were the best times playing those with my bro and sis. Especially loved the website Purple-Moon.com which I spent many an hour on.
I consider comp games and stuff to be toys!

I was also SOOOO obsessed with American Girl stuff and dolls for years and years as a young kid. I even saved up all my money (it was $124 after shipping if I remember correctly), to buy a doll, and after about a year and a half of saving Christmas, birthday, and chore money, I finally bought one. Only to realize I was then too old to really enjoy her, other than fulfilling the original desire to own her. She still sits in a box. Unless I have a kid eventually, I wonder if she’ll ever again have such a caring owner as I was at 9?
I would spent hours just reading every line of those catalogs. Doing the math on how much more money I needed… Literally saving pennies to get her.
Other than her, I was obsessed with all of that brand’s products. I was also really into Littlest Pet Shop toys, and some of my other favorites were my two catwoman action figures, and a lego knight I called “The Black Knight” which rode a black horse and wore black and grey armor. When I was really young I had a toy truck I called “Indie truck” after Indiana Jones, I thought about him for a long time after misplacing him, I never forgot!
… I was a weirdo.

Here’s some of my toys from childhood that I managed to save from the boxes of junk my parents either got rid of or have somewhere in storage… I need to find ALL my stuff and get it from them if I ever have a place to store it. I’ll take better photos of these guys at some point… I didn’t feel like putting a ton of effort into it today.





(All the images are linked to larger versions, if you want to see them larger)
◆ What’s the most important thing you own?
Probably have to say my computer. I use it almost daily, it’s the source of communication with all of my friends, my family, and my art… It’s incredibly important to me really.

◆ How is a normal day of your life?
A normal day in my life consists of me waking up a few hours after Trev has left for work (I’m sorry Trev!!.. But I stay up much later than him usually). Rinsing off in the bath (I do this ritualistically, every morning and night… I hate feeling dirty), getting decently dressed (usually in pajamas), and then deciding on what my project for the day will be.
Sometimes I make to-do lists the night before so I don’t get sidetracked online.

Usually the projects are like “clean the house” so I’ll clean a lot and spend the majority of the day doing that… More often they’re like “do something arty, make something. Scan drawings. Edit photos…” etc. Or “post an entry on diary”… You get the idea. I do have an “artist’s life” so I spend a lot of time making art, thinking about what to make next, scheming about it, promoting myself online, looking for work… I feel bad that I’m not more “productive” sounding than that because it makes me sound lazy, but it’s actually a lot of hard focused work. Just not very normal I guess…

◆ Who’s your favorite artist?
This one is hard but I will say a few that have stuck with me at the core throughout my life… I like a ton of artists though, especially people I now have the pleasure of knowing, or some that I just admire from afar online… But some of my faves are (in no order):

• Louis Wain (pictured st)
• Winsor McCay (pictured 2nd)
• Igor Pantuhoff (pictured 3rd)
• Henry Darger (pictured 4th)
• Oyari Ashito (pictured 5th)
• Elodie LostFish (I used to draw her art for practice all the time, she was a huge inspiration growing up, it’s interesting to see how much she’s changed over the years. pictured 6th)
• Aya Takano (pictured 7th)
• Audrey Kawasaki
• Emily Winfield Martin
• Marisol (Mako) (It sounds silly because she’s a close friend, but she’s inspired me a ton since I met her several years ago!)
• Rachel Smythe (Her old comic “The Doctor Pepper Show” inspired me immensely)
• Sally Mann
• Nan Goldin

Here’s where I link some of my faves that have websites, in my LINK section of my main site.

◆ What’s your favorite pair of shoes?
I kind of love all my shoes equally for different reasons. But my favorite pair aesthetically would have to be the platform wedges I bought a few years ago and almost never ever wear. They’re SO tall, and I feel like I look funny walking in them, plus, living in Texas, you cannot go out in something like this without people treating you like you have leprosy or something… So I don’t wear them as often as I’d love to. They are “trailer trash chic” in my mind, which is why I love them hardcore.

I also very much love my Victorian-esque boots, my doc martins, my Emily brand kitty faced mary janes, my Lolita oxfords, and these heeled oxfords that literally cause nerve damage to my feet every time I wear them (but they’re just too pretty! hahaha)

when the fox hears the rabbit cry by BEYOURPET

◆ Who are your favorite bands or singers?
I’ve never liked compiling lists of fave bands/singers very much because I have so many and like a wide variety of music… I guess these are some of my all time faves in no order (the links bring up the artist’s Last.fm page, in case you wanna listen to some of their music):
Björk
Fiona Apple
The Paper Chase
Modest Mouse
Sneaker Pimps
Loli Ripe (18+ nsfw)
Elbow
Xiu Xiu
Animal Collective
Radiohead
Marc M. Sick Animation (18+ nsfw)
Final Fantasy (Owen Pallett)
Nat King Cole
Joanna Newsom
CocoRosie
James Blake

Honestly there’s so many more but I just can’t think… If anyone is actually interested, I have a Last.fm account that is sometimes hooked up to my player (although I don’t think it is right now…)
◆ What’s your favorite bag or backpack?
I really love my bear backpack. I am in love with animal shaped bags. They’re surprisingly hard to find though! But honestly I have an obsessions with cute bags. I just can never afford to buy them so I only get them every so often. But I love all the ones I have right now! I love highly functional bags that are really cute at the same time. The bear bag is more cute than functional, so he is the exception.

◆ What’s your favorite movie?
I have a lot of them. I keep favorites based on mood, so nothing really stands out as a #1 top fave… But a few of my faves are these (links go to the film’s IMDB page which usually has trailers and images if you want to see what the movie is like):
The Ring (US version)
Pretty Baby
Plain Dirty (aka Briar Patch)
Lolita (1997 version)
The Clique
White Oleander
The Piano
The Secret of Roan Inish
A Little Princess
◆ Do you have a lot of friends or just a few?
Very very few actually. I have a lot of online friends that I don’t talk to often, and only a handful of close online friends whom I talk to more often (but still not daily or even weekly sometimes). Only a handful of close people in real life, but I only see one of them on a regular basis (Trev), and most live in other places…

I love all my friends and feel really grateful to have them. But I wish we could see each other in real life, sometimes I just crave being able to spend time with them. Or have a sleep over or a ghost seance party or something…!

◆ Have you ever felt sad about material stuff?
Definitely. I am not strictly a material person, because I’ve done without and I can do without. But I do love my *things*, I get very nostalgic about them and sometimes almost think of them as living breathing, especially silly little toys and such. And I depend way too much on stuff like my computer (for every day life, career, friends), and I depend way too much on even sillier stuff for my dose of happiness (like getting a new journal, planner, video game, or decorating something I use regularly).
I also am very poor, so I get sad that I can’t buy things I want more often, haha. I usually get all my stuff as gifts from family and friends during the holiday or birthday times.
And I get sad sometimes that I can’t buy things to make someone else happy (like a gift, or to make the house nicer for Trev, or for our pets, etc)…
So yes I often get sad about material stuff I’d say…

Sometimes it makes me super jealous to see all the beauty guru girls showing their makeup or fashion “hauls”. The concept of a “haul” video just seems so weird to me, that anyone could shop that regularly. But I guess I’m jealous because if I had money I probably would shop a lot too… But my “hauls” usually consist of birthday/Christmas hauls, or “I spent only $100 that I got for my bday at a thrift store and got all this stuff!” hauls. Which makes a lot more sense I think than going shopping every single day… But oh well. I like being thrifty too, it makes me feel proud of all the stuff I can get for so little!

And now for my questions if anyone decides to do this tag…
I tag YOU!!!
And all the people that I follow or comment on regularly through blog or social networking! Please link to your version of this tag in the comments so I can see what you did!:

1. Are you very different now as you were when you were younger?
2. What is something about your current life that you love, and something you hate?
3. How do you relax and de-stress your life?
4. If you could have any lifestyle and routine, what would it be?
5. What are some of your favorite things online to do/look at?
6. What were your favorite books when you were a child?
7. How would you describe your everyday beauty or fashion routine?
8. When you have no obligations, how do you prefer to spend your free time?
9. What are you favorite foods or recipes?
10. What are your favorite anime or cartoons?
11. What interesting places have you traveled to?

*Sorry I don’t want to tag individually because I don’t know who even reads this diary! And everyone that I know reads it was already tagged.*

Well this whole entry with the photos and everything took up just about my entire day… That is really sad, no wonder I don’t have a job… I need to be more productive in a real way! Especially since I don’t think very many people actually visit this diary… Boooooo!